Monday, April 7, 2014

“Grandma Said I Could!” Solving Parent-Grandparent Conflicts

Good morning everyone!

Do you have children and struggle to establish boundaries with your parents? Or your in-laws? Today, I am sharing an article on this struggle and perhaps it can help! Check it out below:

“Grandma Said I Could!” Solving Parent-Grandparent Conflicts
8 Guidelines for Navigating Parent-Grandparent Differences

Even though there is a new order with adult children now heading the family unit, parents should keep in mind that grandparents connect the family. Therefore, whenever possible, a group effort that includes making some decisions together is the strongest way to be sure that your children are cared for the way you want. Patience and respect are critical. When grandparents respect their adult children’s authority over the children, they gain their adult children’s confidence.

A Parent’s Checklist for Working Together

Caring for grandchildren can be frustrating at times, but wise parents and grandparents make the situation manageable by building trust and recognizing that the children’s needs and well being come first. 

Grandparents are usually a pivotal source of love, warmth and support in your child’s development. Many are a key source of relief for stressed-out parents. Nonetheless, conflicts arise, particularly in families with young children. 

Here are steps parents can take to create a unified front:

-Don’t take advantage of a good thing by overburdening grandparents.
-Pay attention to how your parents are holding up. Watch for signs that you may need to lighten the load.
-Listen attentively to what a grandparent has to say or wants to tell you about your children.
-Admit when you are wrong and a grandparent is correct about something pertaining to your children.
-Acknowledge grandparents’ efforts, both large and small.
-Speak favorably about grandparents in front of your children.
-Remind your children that they are to follow their grandparent’s instructions.
-Don’t be jealous of the time grandparents and grandchildren spend together; it helps you tremendously, and is beneficial for all concerned. 

For more information on adult child-parent relationships, see Under One Roof Again: All Grown Up and (Re)learning to Live Together Happily

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